they need to just BURY HIM!
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
i came on her dog
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
