maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
