is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize