May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
