I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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