I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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