she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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