i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
