when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
