So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
