Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
