apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
