how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
