Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
