Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
