if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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