I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
