I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Randomize
