Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
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