Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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