Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
