the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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