I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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