She's JV to your varsity
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
