Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Randomize