when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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