i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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