Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
