just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
