She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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