i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
