he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Everclear isn't food dammit
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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