Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
