Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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