So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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