Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
