this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
You pole danced in your parka.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
