vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
