No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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