WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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