Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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