Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
