Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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