coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
