therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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