You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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