Got a toothbrush?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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