I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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