Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
