He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
